My writing about my tooth.

I have been writing a story about my tooth. At the start of my story I have tried to hook my readers in by using detail to help the reader get a picture in their head. Here are some examples of detail that I added to my story

The music was pumping loud as it sounded like it was going through the hole town.

I cuddled up into my blanket as I was putting my tiny teeth under my pink comfy pillow.
Something that challenged me was my vocabulary words and sentences. Sometimes I get stuck on making the sentences because I don't know what to type or I don't know what to do to make my sentence make sense. To help me fix up my sentences I read over them one at a time and then fix up the words so it makes sense. I am trying to start my sentences in different ways.

Here are some examples of the different ways I started my sentences

As I was eating.....

Looking in the mirror....

While I was...

After tea....

I really enjoyed fixing my sentences because when I am reading over them I get more and more ideas for my sentences. As I was writing I was thinking of funny ideas to add into my writing.

Next time I could write more information and detail for my story and write my ideas in my planning book to help me remember all the different ideas I want to add into my writing.

Here is my Sore Aching Tooth story.

My sore aching tooth

(Chapter 1 all the complaining)

As I was eating my breakfast I tasted something I never tasted before. Running to my pitch-black room I say “I need to look in my mouth, but I need to switch my light on”. Shaking and shaking I stay still frightened so I turned the light on and looked in the mirror. Looking in the mirror I see red coral blood. As I was screaming to my mum  my throat was like it was getting bitten from a spider(yuck!)   I told my mum the story , so she looked in my mouth and said that my 2nd tooth was wiggly. 5 minutes later she said that I had to go to the dentist to get my tooth pulled. Glaring up at my Mum I say “do I really need to get my  back teeth out” she replied “yes you do because you have been eating too much lollies and you have a bad toothache”.” Oh no” I said I need to come up with a plan or I will be going to the dentist to get my teeth pulled out. I went to bed and had a dream that I was getting all my teeth out and I said to myself WAIT!!! I need to get my teeth pulled out because my Mum will keep on complaining and complaining about it. I had a good night sleep until my Mum was complaining and I could hear her voice. Blah blah blah she was talking about this and that. I said “could you go please go and complain to dad”.

(Chapter 2 going to the dentist)

In the morning I got up so late I had to get dressed and everything in 10 minutes. I was so nervous because I was getting my teeth pulled out. I never wanted to get my teeth pulled out.Walking to the car I was thinking I hope this doesn't hurt. We were finally there. As we were walking amongst the room I could barely breath. Before I got my teeth pulled out the nurses put on numb gel on my gum (numb gel is a type of gel that makes your teeth or where you put it numb) While I was getting my teeth pulled out I was staring up at the light and thinking will this hurt or with this just be fine.I started to daydream of what could I buy with this money maybe my own play station, my own t.v, or would I just save it to my my own queen bed ahh that would be nice and comfortable. In the dentist they said that they were going to pull out the two back ones.

(Chapter 3 going home)

Pouncing into the car my gum started to feel sore. As me, my sister, my cousin and mum were leaving the dentist I had two long cotton in my mouth It was annoying because dribble keeps on coming out and there were heaps of water in my mouth that was DISGUSTING!!!!!!! After a long drive we stopped at Pak ‘n’ save and my mum brought me lemonade ice blocks. I said to myself I wonder what my dad is doing maybe cleaning the house up, doing the lawns, doing our room, aahhhh that's a great idea. I might make my little sister do my chores and her chores at the same time. As we were driving home I was looking at McDonald I couldn’t stop looking there I just wanted to eat there. “Anyway let's get home so I can relax” I said. As we were pulling up thru the drive thru I started to feel pain. When we parked up I feel asleep because I wanted my dad to carry me back inside(Ain’t I lazy) He started to tickle me so I woke up because I didn’t like how it felt. Jogging towards the door I see dripping blood. Thinking what could I do with this blood I might not be able to go inside.

(Chapter 4 at home)

Making my way towards the door I see my mouth pouring out blood. Making plans I say to myself I can run straight to the bathroom so that all the blood can drip into the sink.

Seeking threw the bathroom door I see a cockroach I said “I ain’t going near that little creature I don’t like those”. Making my way through my room I fall onto my bed hearing silent things. I was thinking has everybody went, until they were shouting, slamming the doors, vacuum on and the music was pumping loud as it sounded like it was going through the hole town. I screamed loud as possible they still couldn’t hear me. It was finally time to have tea. We had delicious roast chicken I was so nice I couldn’t stop eating it. After tea me, my sister and cousin had to clean up. Only me and my cousin got to have a ice - cream because my sister already had hers. It was time to go to bed. I cuddled up into my blanket as I was putting my tiny teeth under my pink comfy pillow. Waking up in the morning I threw my pillow away and had 50$ (nah just joking) I had 20$. I happily ran to my mum and said “I have 20$” she replied “OK we can go for a ride in town later”. She also said “go and get ready and by the time mum and dad wake up we can get ready and go”. Mum and dad were already to go into town. Excitedly  jogging to the car I already had my head full of ideas.

What’s your story about your tooth?

Camp Omatua fun

Totara had a wonderful time at camp Omatua even the rain started to pour down.

Thanks to the teachers and parents for supporting Totara whanau.

On the first night at camp Omatua everyone had made apple desserts
with chocolate chips, brown sugar and cinnamon. While they
were cooking the hub was playing spotlight.

My biggest achievement was making a catapult with Aspen and Lealou.
While Aspen was making our catapult Lealou was creating a catapult and
then we started playing with her catapult.

My biggest challenge was the fear factor because when you had put a
 blindfold on,  you had been given something yuck
or yum to eat.

I have enjoyed spending time with my friends Keisha and Aspen.
It was fun playing with them.

Here is a photo of me, Jharvarnah, Ben M and Lucas.
This is a photo of me and my group winning the back pack challenge.

Something I really enjoyed at camp Omatua was going down the water slide

because when you pass the black plastic you got to get a lollie pop.

Here's me, Jacob v, Isabelle washing and drying the dishes and
Ryan Taylor-Gee was also helping but he just didn't get in the photo.
The parents were so hungry, busy and helpful they needed a break.

Here is Totara Whanau exploring the down low area by the fire pit.

Here are a bunch of friends playing head bands. Kasaiyah Ellazay,
Aotea Isabelle, Emma and me (Of Course)

People waiting excitedly to go on the water slide.

One of my favorite things were tubing along the river with my friend Jharvarnah.

Keisha is enjoying a mouth full of chocolate.

Isabelle is enjoying tubing along the river.

The girls being artists.

Look at Mrs Ramsay playing twister with Jada.

The girls and boys playing hand ball.

Everyone waiting to play spotlight.

Henrietta, Emma and Charlotte Orr are doing the back pack challenge

Something that I enjoyed was the chocolate game because when ever you had rolled number 6 you had to dress up crazy with the spider-man glove and cut as many chocolate pieces as you can, until the next person had rolled 6. The chocolate was delicious but I only got to eat a little bit.

My biggest challenge was the fear factor because you had to put a blindfold on and eat something yum or disgusting. It was quite fun because when I had the blindfold on I had chocolate icing. It was funny watching the other people having a turn because they didn't know what it was and because they were stuffing it in there mouth to win.

One of my favorite parts of camp was tubing along the freezing cold water. As me and Jharvarnah were tubing our bottoms were scraping on the huge big rocks. As Daniel was pushing me and Jharvarnah we were spinning and spinning and I got so dizzy.


My biggest achievement was hiding in the pitch black. It was sore when I had to bend on my knees it was like It was like I was falling asleep. It was fun play spotlight but it was tricky finding the groups. As my group was creeping at the top by the kitchen I could smell our desserts cooking and I just wanted to eat them so bad I forgot my group was gone.

Vocab word

I have been learning to do a vocab word for one of our learning experiences.

A vocab word is when you choose a word from your reading book and you write information like write synonymy, word, meaning, add a picture, write your own sentence and the sentence from the book with the word in it.

I am proud of my vocab words because I take my time for writing things but it gets hard for me to write and think when people are talking. I am also proud of my vocab words because I have put detail in and I have also took my time instead of rushing.

Next time I could get more information, put punctuation in and take my time. I could also remember my iPad number because one time I forgot my iPad number and I had to restart my vocab word.

Something that challenged me was getting a photo and finding the information quick. It is also hard to find synonyms for the word.

I really enjoyed doing my vocabulary word because I liked writing all my information onto the page, putting in the detail and writing what I know about blood - curdling.

Here is a photo of one of my vocab words. This vocab word is Blood - curdling

The secret message

This week I have been learning to write a about a secret message in a bottle for my writing. This is a learning experiment for Totara hub.

Something that has challenged me is writing all the punctuation, detail, adding powerful words and sentence starters.

I am proud of writing this story because I think I have put heaps of detail, powerful words and good sentences in for my writing.

Next time I could  add more writing, stay on the same paragraph, think about good words and write chapters.

I have enjoyed writing about this story because when I read over it I am creating a picture in my head and it is making me wanting to add more sentences and paragraphs so that I get more detail and create a bigger picture in my head.

All about dogs

I have been learning heaps  about dogs because I think they are cute and soft . I choose dogs because I know about dogs and because I have my own dog at home. I am proud of my writing because I have put information in, detail and punctuation. Punctuation is when you have capital letters, full stops, commas and more. Something that challenged me the most was spelling big words and thinking what to write. Next time I could try to work harder, don't talk to the person next to me and think more for my information. I really enjoyed making this presentation because I put heaps of information and detail in each slide. I like to create presentation because when I already know what my presentation is about I don't need to search things up on the internet I could just write all the information down

India

What we done this week in the modern learning environment.

This week has been different because Totara hub is going in one room for modern learning.

I enjoy getting to know new people and its fun because you get to do fun activity's like genius hour, blogging, fitness, weighing things for maths and writing about your holiday.

Thanks Mrs Milne, Mrs Hardaker and Mr Ford for helping out three home learning classes. All three home learning classes enjoy having you as our teachers.